Sitting in the Park (18 and 19)

Jenna sat in the park, looking at the trees, the orange and red leaves falling to the ground, the green beauty of the grass and the bushes, watching the people run on the paved paths, following with her eyes the kids running around playing games, living carefree, it was so peaceful. "I wish life could always be this peaceful, this simple. My life hasn't been like this since I was a little kid. Ever since I lost my mom things have never been the same. I wish I could just stay here in the park and people watch for the rest of my life. It's so easy and there are no complications, unlike everything else I get myself into. I remember when things were easy, when I was a little girl. Seems like everything changed the moment I started 7th grade..." As she sat there thinking she remembered the first day of 7th grade, she had got her period during lunch and ran home at the first chance she had. "Oh No! This can't be happening. There's no way I'm getting my period already I'm only 12!" She ran down her street, passing the red, pink, blue, and green houses, spotting her house at the end of the street, it seemed so far away. No matter how fast she ran it seemed to be getting farther and farther away from her, everyone was staring at her; the little girl crying and running down the middle of the street. She finally got to her house and ran into her dad "Dad! I think I got my period today. I don't want it, I don't want to grow up!" He started laughing and hugged her, and called over her mother. "No. No. No! I can't believe he was calling my mom over she was going to start crying and never talk to me again because I was growing up. She always told me the day I got my period was the day she was going to stop talking to me, because that meant I was beginning to be a real teenager, and was going to start being a bitch like all of the other teenager girls she knew. I didn't want him to tell her I didn't want to lose my mom! I couldn't help but cry even harder as she came to me". To her surprise her "mom was very warm "Let's get you a pad" she said and took her to the bathroom (37 TMV). Her father later brought her a card saying, "To my little girl who isn't so little anymore" (35 TMV).

"That day did end up ending pretty well to my surprise, I told my mom about her shunning me and she said she would never do that, she was just joking when she said she would, thank god! I can’t imagine how I would have gotten through so many points in my life without my mother, she always knew the right things to say, at least until the day she actually did stop talking to me. I really do love my mom, and I miss her, I wish she could still be here with me today, but I don't want to think about that right now, it's my time to be in the park and relax... Though I remember the first time she talked to me about sex, that was the last time we talked... I can still remember the last thing I said to her "I feel as if I'm talking to a wall. I wish you'd answer. I feel so alone" (205 THT). I can't believe she stopped talking to me after I told her what happened with Jesse, especially after dad died. The only person I had was her, I miss her. She actually has shunned me now and I don't know what to do.  I dream about seeing her so much and having her actually talk to me. "I dream that I get out of bed and walk across the room. I'm at home and she's running to meet me, I begin to cry, because I know I'm not awake" (119 THT). Why do I always have these dreams, all they do is torture me? I wonder if she realizes how much harder she's making things for me... I can't stop thinking about that night and I wish I could just talk to her about it"

"Wow. My parents are gone for the night. I should definitely call Jenna. This could finally be my chance to sleep with her. Yes! Ok I'm going to call her. What should I say "Hey babe, do you want to have sex tonight" No I don't think that would go that well, the last time I was that blunt she said that "Men are sex machines, and not much more. They only want one thing" (153 THT). I learned my lesson from that one...Though, that was like a year ago, maybe she won't care as much now. Ok I'm going to call her"
"Huh, I wonder what Jesse is doing tonight, I'm so bored" She sat at her desk looking out the window, looking at her little brother and his friends play football in the street, running through all the leaves that kept falling through out the day, watching the trees blow in the wind wondering how they were playing football in the cold windy weather. "How is the football actually going in the direction they throw it? It's so windy out even the trees are moving... weird. Whatever... Ooh! Jesse! Yay! Maybe he's going to invite me over!" She talked to Derek and he wasn't as blunt but he wasn't very subtle either, she knew what he wanted but she was happy to go over she was bored and had nothing else to do. When she got to his house it was quiet, she stepped inside and went to his room. It was dark she couldn't see where he was. She then spotted him and he approached her. "Wow OK seems like he wants to get right down to the point. "He's undoing my dress, a man made of darkness." I like it though, it's almost mysterious, like being with a stranger "I can't see his face, and I can hardly breathe, hardly stand, his mouth is on me, his hands, I can't wait, love, it's been so long, my arms around him." (273 THT)
"That's the only part I like to think about, the rest of it didn't go as well... I wish he would have respected my wishes. I thought I was ready and was really enjoying being with him at first, but once things started to get more serious I changed my mind. I thought he would have been the kind of guy that would respect that, I mean we were together for 2 years. How hard is it to respect your girlfriend’s wishes? I really don't understand. I always sacrificed things for him; I did everything for him. Why couldn't he just do that one thing for me? OK Jenna, stop thinking about it, he was an ass hole, and this was almost 5 years ago you're OK now." 
Jenna sat in the park, looking at the trees, the orange and red leaves falling to the ground, the green beauty of the grass and the bushes, watching the people run on the paved paths, following with her eyes the kids running around playing games, living carefree, it was so peaceful. "This is my day to relax. Know more negative thoughts. I'll take a nap and enjoy the fresh air".